Friday, October 2, 2009

Why this blog

I have been awake since 4:00am this morning. My car was at the shop and if I wanted to make it to the gym today without huge inconvenience to my family, I needed to get there and back before their day began. I did it (woo hoo for me- it was definitely mind over mattress), but right now, at 10 something pm and no nap, I am feeling a bit tender. And open.

So, this is why I am doing "why this blog." If I tried to write this tomorrow morning or for the past few weeks, it wouldn't happen.

I am quiet. I like to get to know other people. Not many other people know much about me. If we met, you'd most likely be a quick acquaintance or friend, if you were open to it. You'd probably tell me quite a bit about your life and I would file it away & hope that someday we would meet again--like that really nice woman who shared a sandwich with me in the Denver airport. It was a really good sandwich. She was a very nice woman.

If you are a person who I might be around in social situations or more frequently, I will smile and learn about you. If you hear the line, "so tell me about you," you might be talking to me. I love learning about other people, your lives are so interesting. But, I am afraid of letting you get to know me. I am afraid that you won't like me.

That said, not many folks know too much about me. I noticed myself becoming invisible. I would like to not be invisible and this might be one of the bravest things I've done. Being "out there," as a friend refers to this, is very scary to me.

I am not looking for recognition or validation. I am not looking for attention or comments or criticism. I think I am supposed to contribute something to this world whatever that might be. I want to have a voice. I want to be an influence for good.

And know I've borne my soul, I am going to go to bed or go sit by my mr on the couch.

Good night.


  1. You are the best friend anyone could ask for! You listen and don't judge. You are the kindest, sweetiest, smartest most beautiful young lady ever! I don't know what I would do with out you. People are blessed your in thier lives! Especially me!!!!!

  2. I'm going to cry now. I love my friends.


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