Friday, October 30, 2009

Where did Speed Racer go?

According to my clock, there are one and an half hours before Halloween.
I have one little item left to make for a little guy's costume, but the action figure I was using as my example has gone missing. I think he may have run away.
He was in my hot little hand this morning & I remember thinking, "I should put this in a safe place so I can finish up."
I must have put him in a very safe place. Maybe he thought I was too hot.
I hope I wasn't holding trash in my other hand while I was having my safe place thoughts.
And on that note; Kristen, I hope your keys are just in a safe place and want you to know you aren't the only one who lost something today.
Lesson-put the silly action figure on top of the felt and scissors that are waiting for you at the first possible opportunity and get it done!!!

Post Publish Note:
That was written at 10:30pm. Fessed up to my mr. at 11:00pm. He said, "omph. that's my toy." (He kindly shares it with master j.) I said, "I'm so sorry. I'm sure we'll find him." 11:45pm Went to say my prayers with the little guy weighing on my mind. Began to kneel and saw a little white leg poking out under a piece of furniture in my room. Gave a quick thank you prayer & came to share the news that my eve of Halloween turned out well. I don't know about Kristen's.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Tony Estlinbaum, our friend

OK, so I know that my dear best friend (who doesn't even enjoy reading) & my mr. are the only people who read this blog, but I'm hoping that maybe someday you others will come on in and visit a bit. This story is for you.

Last spring, master b was on a soccer team. My mr. was the coach.
They were a great group of kids and played hard. There were a couple of stand out players. One's name is Tony Estlinbaum. He was tough, agile, strong & smart playing soccer this spring.

As it goes when your kids have activities together, we got to know him and his family a bit. They are hardworking, "salt of the earth" kind of people. At 10 years old, Tony even had his own lawn mowing business.

So along comes the nasty flu. (We've been washing our hands extra well, have you?)
And Tony catches it--or really it caught Tony. When we found out that he was in the hospital, we added him and his family to our prayers. The video footage of him in the hospital showed a very different boy than we knew.

It was wonderful to see on our local news that he headed home yesterday. It was sad to see the toll this bug has taken on this sweet boy. I am so happy for the Estlinbaum family that they are all home together tonight. I hope that this will be their hardest trial in life and that it is over for good.

If you'd like to read CBS's national report from tonight click here. If you knew him and watch this video, it might make you cry-just to warn you!
If you'd like to help out the family with medical expenses, click here for contact info. Tell them it's for Tony.

PS-Don't really know if this is really appropriate after this post, but-woo hoo, I learned how to put in a click "here" thingy! Learning everyday. How about that.

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Life Lesson

Yesterday, I had the opportunity to teach one of my precious children about something sad in our world.
My ten year old asked me what abortion was.
The looks on his face when I explained almost broke my heart.
He has compassion.

He's growing up.
He doesn't even know the "facts" yet, but I can see the questions coming soon.
It always makes me sad when I have to teach my children about some things that go on in the world.
I love their innocence.

I'm so thankful though, that when the time comes, mr & I will sit and explain and hopefully help them make sense of the world.
Thankful for that responsibility and hope we bear it well.

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Knowledge and Wisdom

This little post is about knowledge and wisdom. Something I am lacking in this bloggity sphere. So, to read it, you get to have a little adventure. Please start at the bottom and scroll your way up. I hope to someday be wise in the ways of posting. Until then, enjoy.

Very, very wise.

The neighborhood had knowledge. One of the neighbors is wise.

They are picking on the old. (This one's really cool. The other side of the tree is dead & the wood is so hard, they can't get it.)

They are picking on the young. (Notice, another sign and the sticks in the water-I think it's a trap.)

Another one bites it. And now the neighborhood knows. Notice the little white sign on the middle left. Pest control. Lower far left-I think might be near the trap.

Very busy indeed. (Does this shadow make me look fat?)

There are some very busy beavers in our neighborhood.

Monday, October 19, 2009

Today is ending a happy day because

two teenage girls were happy.

One preschool joker remembered a joke big brother had taught him.
"What are you eating under there?"


Sunday, October 18, 2009


When I was a young mom, I read and read and read. I looked for mentors on how to raise my children wonderfully. I studied. I did for them.
Now I am not a young mom anymore. I am in a middle phase.

My oldest keeps cutting the apron strings thread by thread. Friends are of great importance. I can envision the day that is quickly coming where she is no longer the teen that she is. Our days of "attitude" are becoming less frequent.

My second is beginning the same. The days of "attitude" are becoming more frequent.

Third is deeply involved in his decade of life. He went into the woods with a neighborhood friend this week. Friend's father was there, but a new letting go experience for me.

The last is now an older preschooler. He still follows me around like a shadow each day. But, two days ago, a knock came at our door. A little neighbor asked if could come out to play. He went out, running down the street with his friend, by themselves. Me-following through every window of the house making sure they arrived to the designated play site, where I knew the other mom was watching. And me-feeling pieces of my heart changing, falling, moving.

I do not have a mentor for this.
I am making my own way. It is a very weird journey.

There is so much information out there about different phases of women's lives. There's getting married, creating a home, raising children, working, taking care of aging parents, getting older.
There seems to be a lack of information about the middle space that I am in. I am looking.

I did find something the other day that spoke to me. It's linked at the bottom.
Referring to that, I do believe that I have arrived at the space she describes I am still getting comfortable, but I am there.

My ability to be clever has turned itself into an ability to be wise.

I have trained my brain to assess the needs of others before my own.

My charm comes from not feeling pressure to be charming.

I prefer the simple life. The life I have now.
(taken from the blog cjanerun--see link at bottom)

Friday, October 16, 2009

Oh my!

So, I was just completing my late night blog stalking & came across something that made my heart skip.

As I was checking in with wonderful mrs b and mrs s, looking at their fun, fun, fun (how I wish I could be fun like them) family and friend pictures and posts, I did my usual blog stalking technique of peeking at their "lists" of other people's blogs. I saw the coolest name for a blog & almost clicked on it. Then I was me. Wow.

My dear mrs (or should it read mrses?), hugs to you. Big ones.


The past few months, I've been big in training mode. I didn't do it on purpose, I just ended up here.

I've been weight training for over a year now.
A very independent, dominant, & excitable puppy entered our family's lives. She and I are in dog training.
An opportunity to learn a form of brain training arose, so I went to that training and I am preparing to train other people using those methods.

In my weight training (fyi-I'm not hardcore), I've learned that I have to push past my comfort zone and go heavier than I'd like sometimes. I have to struggle sometimes. I sweat-I've grown to enjoy that sweat because I know that I am tearing my muscle fibers apart and later, they will repair. I will be stronger. I am stronger.

The dog, oh the dog. We've never had a dog before. She's a whole separate post, but for now I will tell you that she's not really the one in training, I am. I've learned that I have to stand up to her, let her know that I am in charge, and be very firm. We go to class, work, go home and practice. I really have to push her. She makes a mistake, there is a quick correction and we move on. A simple "eehh" noise when I start seeing her lose focus brings her attention back to me--sometimes. We've been to 12 weeks of classes. It's been a struggle. She's improved. I've gained some confidence with her. We are improving.

A main theme in the brain training is "push to the struggling point." Some of the exercises are intense and designed to push the student to their cognitive limit. The trainer has to be firm and in charge. I had an epiphany during an example training exercises when the trainer made the same "eehh" noise I use with the dog when the student made a mistake. Right after the noise, he said, "no, start again." No talking about the problem, no analysis, just moving on. Oh, and there was no time for whining. Push, struggle, gain.

My epiphany: So I've been watching people around me deal with their own personal struggles; health, economic, social, etc. I've been watching our country going through some very strange times. I've been a bit weirded out. But I know we are in training.

Push, struggle, gain.
To get where we need to be.
Push, struggle, gain.

Saturday, October 10, 2009


Did something brave last night.
Worked on my courage muscles.
Gave someone I don't know well the blog address.
Hope she visits.
Hope she enjoys.


A funny thing happened this afternoon while I was sitting on the couch, being a potato, trying to remember something I forgot, & keeping one of my people company. I saw something promising on television!!!

But first, this message:
A couple of weeks ago, I went out of town to a seminar to learn a very specific form of "brain training." It's designed to advance a person's cognitive abilities by fairly intense one hour sessions, five times a week, lasting 12 to 24 weeks depending on what is specifically needed for the learner. I went into this to become licensed and learn the program so I could use it on my children -and hopefully get some gains myself. I left the seminar very excited. In my advanced age, I have found my "thing. " Woo hoo. (Well, the program is kind of a subgroup of my larger learning "thing," but you get the picture.) Who knows, if it goes well with the family, maybe I will branch out.

Normally, we don't watch a lot of television, especially on weeknights. This afternoon, my mr. was a sickie (asleep & in and out of it on the couch), there were children present, & (oh my) we turned on the boob tube, saw something called "BrainSurge" on the schedule and took a chance.

Back to our show:
It was fun! And it makes you work (if you so choose to be engaged, focus, and play along). Master B wants to be a contestant. We just might try, after I start and finish training him. If we're going to go for it, I think we should go big and win, don't you agree?

Check it out. It's on at 4:30pm central on weekdays (right now & as far as I know). You might want to check out the Nick website which I've linked to at the bottom. I've also linked to a Wikipedia entry that gives more details.

As we were watching the exciting conclusion, the phone rang. It was master b's cub scout leader. I remembered what I forgot, grabbed my keys and the boy and took him to his meeting.
I think I need to watch the show. Maybe it will help.

I find it very funny, ironic, & interesting that this show is on before and near Spongebob (whom we love). Good medicine.

Saturday, October 3, 2009

Halloween Article

I am still new to this blogging thing and don't know the traditional or appropriate way to say, "Hey, I found something cool. Maybe you'd like a peek." So here's what I'm going to do:

Hey, I found a very interesting article called "The Spiritual Origins of Halloween." It doesn't site references, but does say where he got his information. It's something to think about.

Here's the link:

Ok-how awesome it that that I just learned how to add a link in a blog entry. Woo hoo for me. (What a geek I am-wait-not geek-if I was a true geek, I would already have known how to do this-so- what a dork? Does that work? I think so. Learning something new everyday is good, don't you think? Today was a twofer, woo hoo.)

Friday, October 2, 2009

Why this blog

I have been awake since 4:00am this morning. My car was at the shop and if I wanted to make it to the gym today without huge inconvenience to my family, I needed to get there and back before their day began. I did it (woo hoo for me- it was definitely mind over mattress), but right now, at 10 something pm and no nap, I am feeling a bit tender. And open.

So, this is why I am doing "why this blog." If I tried to write this tomorrow morning or for the past few weeks, it wouldn't happen.

I am quiet. I like to get to know other people. Not many other people know much about me. If we met, you'd most likely be a quick acquaintance or friend, if you were open to it. You'd probably tell me quite a bit about your life and I would file it away & hope that someday we would meet again--like that really nice woman who shared a sandwich with me in the Denver airport. It was a really good sandwich. She was a very nice woman.

If you are a person who I might be around in social situations or more frequently, I will smile and learn about you. If you hear the line, "so tell me about you," you might be talking to me. I love learning about other people, your lives are so interesting. But, I am afraid of letting you get to know me. I am afraid that you won't like me.

That said, not many folks know too much about me. I noticed myself becoming invisible. I would like to not be invisible and this might be one of the bravest things I've done. Being "out there," as a friend refers to this, is very scary to me.

I am not looking for recognition or validation. I am not looking for attention or comments or criticism. I think I am supposed to contribute something to this world whatever that might be. I want to have a voice. I want to be an influence for good.

And know I've borne my soul, I am going to go to bed or go sit by my mr on the couch.

Good night.


I have a friend who is going through tough times.
I feel very sad for her.
I have a friend who lives in Samoa. (earthquake and tsunami this week)
I am worried for her and her family.
I have dear children who are going through their own difficult "growing times."
My heart aches for them.

I have hope.

We all need hope.

Deliver Me From Donut Day

Again, I haven't written in a while, but I don't want to forget this one. It's a doozy. I work in an elementary school. I teach ...